Internal Debate

I wish I was able to find more time to sit down and write about everything that has been happening with our group! It seems like everyday we find ourselves in the midst of a new adventure and a brand new encounter with our amazing God. I still find myself overwhelmed with awe that He is so faithful to reveal Himself to us in a new way every day. I feel like this is something I say a lot, but it is so true! He has been so faithful to our group the last four and a half weeks and we are so blessed.

Even though we find ourselves going through virtually the same routine everyday, I find myself constantly refreshed in our times of worship. Only one part of each concert that I had difficulty reconciling as worship, though, was our spoken introductions to the songs. Each members of the group takes a few moments to give a brief explanation or thought before a song during the program. This serves to make the concerts more personable and to provide a worship focus for the audience. Typically, we end up say about the same thing each night for “our song”. This bothered me, though, because I felt like it was very rehearsed and, therefore, not genuine. Even though I had a solid introduction that worked well in the repertoire, I found myself scrambling to say something different every night.

Finally, I did what I should have done in the beginning and went to the Lord in prayer over this internal debate. I asked that if He wanted me to share what I had been previously on that particular night, He make it clear or reveal something new. I realized then that its not necessarily what we are saying that matters, but the heart behind it. In the same way that singing the same songs each night can still be an act of true worship when our hearts are in the right place, so what we say needs to be a genuine reflection of what God is saying. What a relief and a challenge found in one moment! For with that realization came the responsibility of ensuring that I am doing just so each night, each concert, each song. Such a beautiful reflection of our responsibility as Christians growing in their faith, who must continually allow their hearts to submit to the Greater Lord we serve.

He must increase; I must decrease.

-John 3:30

Week Three??

Wow, it is crazy to realize how much time has already gone by! With the end of today we are officially beginning week three of nine, and time continues to fly by. We have been having such a wonderful time between concerts, van rides, and free time that its been hard to find time to write anything. Part of my lack of recent posts, however, has been due to the fact that I haven't felt like I've had much to write about. We've definitely settled into a routine and it has been easy to let each day go by much the same as the previous. The Lord is incredibly faithful, though. Every night He works in us in a different way to reveal something new about our ministry and the songs we are singing. Tonight, "Be Thou Near to Me" was such a song.

Sundays are usually long days, simply for the fact that they consist of both a morning and evening concert. As tonight's began, I found myself very distracted and unfocused, a product of the long day and the "tour groove". About halfway through the concert, in the midst of the second verse, though, I found myself struck by what we were singing:

"Though in this burden of my making, yet in the shadows still a light I see Maker whose love is not forsaking. Oh Lord, be thou near to me."

Wow, what a stunning picture of our sinful state and God's redemptive power! We are shadowed and burdened, lost in darkness due to our nature; yet God is so merciful! Deep within the shadows of our soul a source of light is found in Him. The power of the chorus was so amplified as I reflected on what these few lines meant.

"And the holy voices sing 'Halleluj! Ever will Thy reign be!' As I wander through this life, oh Lord, be thou near to me."

The song is a cry, and a beautiful reminder of how our attitude should be formed toward Christ. Without Him, we are helpless, lost in darkness, and shrouded by our terribly sinful nature. When we pour out our burdens to Him and ask that He be near to us, He is faithful and does just that. James 4 reminds us that a right relationship with the Lord requires that we abandon our former, sinful lives and ask the Lord to replace them with His life and His desires. We are never called to any form of halfhearted faith, only to one of total abandonment of self.

He must increase; I must decrease.

-John 3:30

Esperanza

Its amazing how quickly time has passed for us! The last few days have been great as we settle into our "tour routine", get to know one another even more, and meet more amazing people along the way at churches and homestays. Every concert has been a success, and it is amazing to see how God orchestrates each one in a different way. Now that our first full week of concerts is completed and we are looking forward to spending our off-day in San Francisco tomorrow. Today we were blessed with some additional downtime and were able to spend a few hours in Yosemite. Although our visit was short, it was wonderful to spend time marveling at the Lord's magnificent creation... and having fun taking many pictures together in the process. ;)

A few nights ago in Orcutt, CA, Kelsey and I stayed with a woman named Esperanza (which, appropriately, means Hope!). She was an incredible wife, mother, grandmother, and woman of God, and we were blessed to spend several hours talking with her about her life. We heard countless stories about her life and family, including beating her teenage grandsons at arm wrestling/basketball/ping pong, growing up in the Philippines, and her work over the last several decades at the small church we had sung at that evening. The most amazing stories, however, revolved around her annual trip to the Philippines to do missions work. Although she looked around 50, Esperanza is 72-years old and has been widowed for the last 6 years. Yet at least once a year she makes a trip to the Philippines to bring clothes and gifts to the people she's built relationships with and lead Bible studies. In every story she told, her heart for these people and her love for the Lord shone through. We only spent a few hours with her, this was evident as the most central part of her life.

I went to bed that night reflecting on how my life reflects Christ. My Savior should be so obvious that He becomes what people see, rather than myself, yet this is rarely the case. We are called to it. When I started blogging about this summer, I selected John 3:30 as a sort of "theme verse". To be honest, I put rather little thought into my selection, simply thinking it seemed appropriate. God works in mysterious, powerful, and incredible ways, and I can already see how he is working in my heart and through the rest of this group to teach this to us. It is so exciting to see changes like this happening already, with so much time left on our journey! Thank you so much for your prayers for the group; we can tell it is doing something and the Lord is working!

He must increase; I must decrease.

-John 3:30

Send Off

We are officially on tour! With our send-off concerts completed, we packed up the van and headed off for the first day of concerts Sunday morning. We did not have far to travel, and it wasn’t long before we arrived at out first concert: Hope Community Baptist Church of Cherry Valley. The church building was a small, modified modular with only about 75 seats. We soon learned that it was a church plant with a rather small group of regular attenders. As the start time approached, there were only about 25 people in the audience and we were very unsure what to expect. God is a God with plans and understanding far greater than ours, however, and the service ended up being a perfect start to the tour.

The pastor preached on Luke 4:1-14, the story of Jesus’ temptation in the wilderness immediately following his baptism. He spoke about how Satan attempted to attack the ministry of Christ in three ways, and these are the same ways he attempts to bring down the ministry of anyone who is rooted in Christ. First, he claims that our needs are more important than the needs of the people surrounding; second, he seeks to convince our hearts to settle for temporal gains of this world; and third, he wants us to take the easy way out in ministry. How appropriate of a message for the eight of us who were just setting out on a nine-week ministry!

Psalm 1351-2 reads:

Praise the Lord.

Praise the name of the Lord,

praise Him, you servants of the Lord,

you who minister in the house of the Lord,

in the courts of the house of our God

These two verses so perfectly sum up what our ministry is. We are traveling not to make CD sales or recruit hundreds of students to attend CBU, although these are essential parts of what we are doing. Ultimately, though, we are traveling to exalt the name of Christ in everything we do and praise the almighty God we are blessed to call Lord. As we travel we will be “[those] who minister in the house of the Lord”. But in order to be effective ministers of the Lord, we must keep our ministry rooted in Him. We cannot fall under these temptations Satan tries to use to attack the work of the Lord. It is important to take care of ourselves physically so we are able to work, but we cannot fall under the impression that our needs are more important than doing what God calls us to do. We cannot get caught up in the temporal gains of this world. The next nine weeks will be filled with opportunities to minister to countless people, but we cannot take the easy way out.

He must increase, I must decrease.

-John 3:30

A Summer of Hope!

What a whirlwind last week it has been! Monday morning I flew back to California to begin a weeklong rehearsal camp for summer small group Hope. We had four days to learn, memorize, and be ready to perform an hours worth of music before we head out on the road to tour for nine weeks of the summer. Needless to say, the week was exhausting, fun, wonderful, challenging, etc., etc.! The week was meant to stretch us as musicians, performers, and speakers, and it certainly did just that. I can already see ways our group, and myself individually, has begun to grow. It has already been an amazing experience and I am so excited to see where we will journey together over the course of the summer.

The nature of a tour such as this absolutely requires a sense of cooperation from each member of the group. Because we will be spending nine long weeks together crammed in a van with all of our equipment and luggage for hours on end, only to arrive and perform and interact with the people we encounter, it is crucial that we maintain good relationships. Over the last six days with these seven people, I have been truly amazed at how quickly we have bonded both musically and personally. We "clicked" from day one and it has been exciting to see how we work together and use our strengths and weaknesses to balance one another. I am truly blessed to be a part of Hope Summer 2011!

Tomorrow is our first official day of tour, although we already have two concerts behind us. Over the next nine weeks, please be in prayer for us as we dive into this incredible ministry. Pray for travel safety and health. Pray for group unity. Pray for our spiritual lives. Pray for our musical abilities to remain strong and continue to grow together. Pray for opportunities to touch people's lives. Pray that we would take each opportunity given to us. But most importantly pray that we are able to represent Christ at every moment of the day.

He must increase; I must decrease.

-John 3:30

Who He Is

In Genesis, He is the Creator God.

In Exodus, He is the Redeemer.

In Leviticus, He is your sanctification.

In Numbers, He is your guide.

In Deuteronomy, He is your teacher.

In Joshua, He is the mighty conqueror.

In Judges, He gives victory over enemies.

In Ruth, He is your kinsman, your lover, your redeemer.

In 1 Samuel, He is the root of Jesse.

In 2 Samuel, He is the Son of David.

In 1 Kings and 2 Kings, He is King of Kings and Lord of Lords.

In 1st and 2nd Chronicles, He is your intercessor and High Priest.

In Ezra, He is your temple, your house of worship.

In Nehemiah, He is your mighty wall, protecting you from your enemies.

In Esther, He stands in the gap to deliver you from your enemies.

In Job, He is the arbitrator who not only understands your struggles, but has the power to do something about them.

In Psalms, He is your song and your reason to sing.

In Proverbs, He is your wisdom, helping you make sense of life and live it successfully.

In Ecclesiastes, He is your purpose, delivering you from vanity.

In the Song of Solomon, He is your lover, your Rose of Sharon.

In Isaiah, He is the mighty counselor, the Prince of Peace, the everlasting Father, and more. He's everything you need.

In Jeremiah, He is your balm of Gilead, the soothing salve for your sin-sick soul.

In Lamentations, He is the ever-faithful one upon whom you can depend.

In Ezekiel, He is your wheel in the middle of a wheel, the one who assures that dry, dead bones will come alive again.

In Daniel, He is the ancient of days, the everlasting God who never runs out of time.

In Hosea, He is your faithful lover, always beckoning you to come back, even when you have abandoned Him.

In Joel, He is your refuge, keeping you safe in times of trouble.

In Amos, He is the husbandman, the one you can depend on to stay by your side.

In Obadiah, He is Lord of the Kingdom.

In Jonah, He is your salvation, bringing you back within His will.

In Micah, He is Judge of the Nation.

In Nahum, He is the jealous God.

In Habakkuk, He is the Holy One.

In Zephaniah, He is the witness.

In Haggai, He overthrows the enemies.

In Zechariah, He is Lord of Hosts.

In Malachi, He is the messenger God.

In Matthew, He is King of the Jews.
In Mark, He is the Servant.
In Luke, He is the Son of Man, feeling what you feel.


In John, He is the Son of God.


In Acts, He is Savior of the world.


In Romans, He is the righteousness of God.


In 1 Corinthians, He is the rock that followed Israel.


In 2 Corinthians, He is the triumphant, victorious one.


In Galatians, He is your liberty ... He sets you free.


In Ephesians, He is Head of the Church.


In Philippians, He is your joy.


In Colossians, He is your completeness.


In 1 Thessalonians, He is your hope.


In 2 Thessalonians, He is your patience and discipline.


In 1 Timothy, He is your faith.


In 2 Timothy, He is your stability.


In Titus, He is the truth.


In Philemon, He is your benefactor.


In Hebrews, He is your perfection.


In James, He is the power behind your faith.


In 1 Peter, He is your example.


In 2 Peter, He is your purity.


In 1 John, He is your life.


In 2 John, He is your pattern.


In 3 John, He is your motivation.


In Jude, He is the foundation of your faith.


In the Revelation, He is your coming King.

Are you Listening?

At this my heart pounds and leaps from its place.

Listen! Listen to the roar of his voice, to the rumbling that comes from his mouth.

He unleashes his lightning beneath the whole heaven and sends it to the ends of the earth.

After that comes the sound of the his roar; he thunders with his majestic voice.

When his voice resounds, he holds nothing back.

God's voice thunders in marvelous ways; he does great things beyond our understanding.

He says to the snow, "fall on the earth," and to the rain shower, "Be a mighty downpour."

So that all men he has made may know his work, he stops every man from his labor.

The animals take cover; they remain in their dens.

The tempest comes out from its chamber, the cold from the driving winds.

The breath of God produces ice, and the broad waters become frozen.

He loads the clouds with moisture, he scatters his lightning through them.

At his direction they swirl around over the face of the whole earth to do whatever he commands them.

He brings the clouds to punish men, or to water his earth and show his love.

Listen to this Job; stop and consider God's wonders.

-Job 37:1-14

This past week I discovered how much I do not necessarily appreciate reading through the book of Job. Its an awesome story of faithfulness and trusting God in uncertainty, but after 30+ chapters of Job and his three friends debating the source of his suffering and repeating their arguments, I was definitely ready to move on to the next chapter in my study. This passage, though, was one that really stuck out to me, and I was left rather awestruck at Elihu's speech to begin chapter 37.

Everything Elihu says to describe the majesty and glory of God brings him such pure delight: At this my heart pounds and leaps from its place! His wonder and joy for the Lord overwhelms him, and then overflows to those around him. "Listen!" he urges, "Listen to the roar of his voice, to the rumbling that come from His mouth." He launches into a fervent dialogue identifying example after example of tangible, earthy examples of God's power. Elihu's passion for this subject practically leaps off the page as he pleads with Job to really listen to what he has said:

Listen to this Job; stop and consider God's wonders. His ardor for the subject is so evident I can just imagine him taking hold of Job's shoulders to look him in the eye. "Are you listening, Job? I mean, really listening? Can you even begin to comprehend such glory?"

This kind of passionate response to God's marvelous glory is so often lacking in my understanding of God. Its easy to worship God for the wonderful things He has done for me, but His inherent praise-worthiness beings simply with who he is, the awesome and powerful creator of the world and of us. Yet how often do I emanate uncontainable praise for my Lord for this reason? Certainly not often enough.

The Temple

I have chosen and consecrated this temple so that my Name may be there forever. My eyes and my heart will always be there.

-2 Chronicles 7:16

Its so easy to breeze through Old Testament readings without really taking the time to contemplate them. Its understandable, though, since they were written for and about a people so long ago, right? Certainly, there is very little relation between these thirty-nine books and our faith today. The Israelites may have served the same God we serve, but that was the Old Covenant. Christ came and did away with all that sacrificial stuff. We're part of the New Covenant. That all may be very well and true, but if today's Christians completely dismiss the value the Old Testament writings have, we're missing out on a beautiful picture of our relationship with Christ. The New Testament doesn't eliminate the need for the Old Testament, but instead becomes a companion to it, so that studying it leads to a deeper understanding.

In the Old Testament, the temple was the place where the glory of God resides. Immediately after being built and dedicated, Solomon's temple is overwhelmed by the presence of God:

When the priests withdrew from the Holy Place, the could filled the temple of the Lord. And the priests could not perform their service because of the cloud, for the glory of the Lord filled his temple.

-1 Kings 8:10-11

(Did you catch that? The glory of God was so overwhelming, the priests couldn't even perform their duties... and the Levites were the MVPs of holiness amongst the Israelites, the only ones who were called to do God's work directly. Wow! Our God is just that marvelous!)

Fastforward a thousand years or so, and Paul is writing to encourage the church in Corinth. He strives to provide answers to their struggles to act as believers in the midst of the world that surrounds them and play out their faith as a unified body of believers. To illustrate his point, he draws a comparison from their former Jewish faith in order to create a picture they can more fully comprehend:

Don't you know that you yourselves are God's temple and that God's Spirit lives in you?"

-1 Corinthians 3:16

God's temple is sacred, and you are that temple.

-1 Corinthians 3:17b

Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, who you have received from God? You are not your own.

-1 Corinthians 6:19

It is here, where the Old and New Testament collide that we find a beautiful portrait of our faith. In the same way that the Temple bore God's name, we bear the name of Christ and represent Him to the world that we live in. As the Old Covenant declared the Temple to be chosen and consecrated, we are God's chosen people, and he has consecrated us, setting us apart from the world as something drastically different (John 15:19). And we have the beautiful promise that, like the Old Testament Temple, the eyes and heart of the Lord are always fixed upon us!

Such a captivating passage that provides so much elaboration of our faith, but would be hidden if we forget to regard the Old Testament for the value it has.

Awaiting an Answer

How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever?

How long will you hide your face from me?

How long must I wrestle with my thoughts

and everyday have sorrow in my heart?

How long will my enemy triumph over me?

Look on me and answer O Lord my God.

Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death;

my enemy will say, "I have overcome him,"

and my foes will rejoice when I fall.

But I trust in your unfailing love;

my heart rejoices in your salvation.

I will sing to the Lord,

for he has been good to me.

-Psalm 13

I love this Psalm for the simple fact that the psalmist never receives an answer. These six short verses are filled with pleading and longing for God's intervention into their bleakest hours, with just a glimmer of hope and trust in the faithfulness of the Lord. But when all is said and done, the writer has not heard a reply from the heavens, and we are left with the understanding that he still finds himself in the same desperate situation he began with.

For me, that's where we find the beauty of this Psalm: in the silence from heaven. For in the midst of an unanswered plea, the author retains his faith and trust that the Lord will deliver in accordance with His perfect plan. He responds to the silence by praising God, "for he has been good to me." Although the context of these six verses do not include an answer, they end with worship.

This leads me to the question, how often do I worship in the waiting? I mean, its one thing to worship after receiving an answer (although that is still something I so often fail at), but to praise his name as I am waiting in silence? The thought seems so foreign in my thinking, and in our society's. To thank and praise someone before they have even given a reply to your request? Ridiculous! But that is the reality of our relationship with Christ. He deserves our worship with every moment of our lives, simply for who he is, and even more so for what he has done in our lives, including the times of silence.

"My heart rejoices in your salvation."

"Wow Moment" for the day:

"Prayer is not a matter of pouring out the human heart once and for all in need or joy, but of an unbroken, constant learning, accepting, and impressing upon the mind of God's will in Jesus Christ"

-Dietrich Bonhoeffer, "Life Together"

Distinction

Let's be really honest for a moment: most Christians simply do not devote oodles of time reading through books in the Old Testament like Leviticus or Numbers. They contain pages and pages of long lists of rules, specifications, measurements, population counts, and other such practices of the Israelites that do not have much immediate meaning for those of us walking with Christ today. After all, we do not perform animal sacrifices, worship in a temple, or march into physical battle as we move into the territory God has promised us.

Tonight, however, I was reading through a few chapters in Leviticus as part of my "Through the Bible in a Year" study. I was almost to the end of tonight's portion when I read the following:

You must therefore make a distinction between clean and unclean animals and between unclean and clean birds. Do not defile yourselves by any animal or bird or anything that moves along the ground- those of which I have set apart as unclean for you. You are to be holy to me because I, the Lord, am holy, and I have set you apart from the nations to be my own.

-Leviticus 20:25-26

Okay, so unclean animals and birds. Don't eat them. Got it. But Jesus declared that was unnecessary as part of the New Covenant God was making with those who chose to follow him in Mark 7:18-20, right? So this all has little application to Christian life today, right? On the surface, of course. We do not have to go through the same rituals the Israelites were succumbed to in the Old Testament in order to retain purity, because we find our identity in Christ. But as I was reading this, something really stuck out to me:

You must therefore make a distinction between clean and unclean animals and between unclean and clean birds. Do not defile yourselves by any animal or bird or anything that moves along the ground- those of which I have set apart as unclean for you. You are to be holy to me because I, the Lord, am holy, and I have set you apart from the nations to be my own.

Those first six words hit me like a ton of bricks. We are to make a distinction. For the Israelites, these pages and pages of laws were designed to retain their purity and show that they were different, set apart, from the rest of the world and did not conform to the standards of the people groups around them. They were different, and they were different because they were God's people and sought to represent their Lord in the best possible human way. Today, we are called to do the same thing. We are called to be set apart and show the world that we find our identity in Christ and we do not want to be related to anything apart from Him. As Christians, we bear the name of Christ, literally, and that name is something the world can see and immediately make a judgment about us for. How often, though, do we bear the name alone and fail to make any other statement about our Savior? As representatives of Christ, we are called to show the world around us that we are different and that difference comes in our sanctification in Christ.

We are to make a distinction.

Terrifying Submission

Test me, O Lord, and try me,

examine my heart and my mind;

for your love is ever before me,

and I walk continually in your truth.

-Psalm 26:2-3

This verse stands in my mind as such a dichotomy of a wonderful promise and a terrifying invitation. Verse two brings an alarming series of requests to God: Test me. Try me. Examine me. Push me. Stretch me. Bring me through valleys. Lead me over mountains. Show me my failings. Reveal my weaknesses. Asking the almighty creator and ruler of the universe for this and giving total control of your life over to Him for His own plans... that absolutely scares me out of mind! The severity of this lies in total submission to one who you know has the power to both destroy you and lift you up.

But its the promise of verse three that diminishes all those fears: because of God's love, we constantly walk with Him and in His plans. That's what dissolves the fear with handing everything over to God. He promises that what he does in our testing is not going to be more than we can handle with him by our side. Through the pushing, pulling, stretching, trial, difficulties, and hardships comes strength, as God molds and makes you into more and more a picture of His glorified servant. We can have confidence in knowing that His testing and trying can be endured as we walk continually with Him and that He makes us into a stronger child of God.

The Ruined Waistband

Thus the Lord said to me, "Go and buy yourself a linen waistband and put it around your waist, but do not put it in water."

So I bought the waistband in accordance with the word of the Lord and put it around my waist.

Then the word of the lord came to me a second time, saying,

"Take the waistband that you have bought, which is around your waist, and arise, go to the Euphrates and hide it there in a crevice of the rock."

So I went and hid it by the Euphrates, as the Lord had commanded me.

After many days the Lord said to me, "Arise, go to the Euphrates and take from there the waistband which I commanded you to hide there."

Then I went to the Euphrates and dug, and I took the waistband from the place where I had hidden it; and lo, the waistband was ruined, it was totally worthless.

Then the word of the Lord came to me, saying,

"Thus says the Lord, 'Just so will I destroy the pride of Judah and the great pride of Jerusalem.

'This wicked people, who refuse to listen to My words, who walk in the stubbornness of their hearts and have gone after other gods to serve them and to bow down to them, let them be just like this waistband which is totally worthless.

'For as the waistband clings to the waist of a man, so I made the whole household of Israel and the whole household of Judah cling to Me,' declares the Lord, 'that they might be for Me a people, for renown, for praise and for glory; but they did not listen.'"

-Jeremiah 13:1-11

Tonight as I was doing my devotion, I came across this story in Jeremiah. It was one I don't ever remember reading or hearing before and I just loved the message God was teaching Jeremiah through it.

In the book of Jeremiah leading up to this point, God has been revealing to Jeremiah the future of the Israelites, warning him that because of they have repeatedly turned away from Him they will be facing destruction like they had never before experienced. The first twelve chapters have been a conversation between God and Jeremiah involving God's decision and Jeremiah's questioning and pleading. This chapter interrupts the conversation as God intends to show Jeremiah exactly what He means. Since he can't seem to comprehend the God's reasoning, He walks him through a real life example.

Like the waistband is made to cling to the waist of its wearer, we are God's prized creation, designed to fit perfectly into His arms. When cling to Him as we were made to do and we walk with Him and never leave his ways. But like the waistband, when we separate ourselves from Him we become ruined. Hiding far away from our original intent, we become worthless.

I love this example God gives Jeremiah. We are so perfect and complete when we are with our Savior, but without Him we can never accomplish what he has so perfectly designed us to do.

For as the waistband clings to the waist of a man, so I made [my people] cling to me... that they might be for Me a people, for renown, for praise and for glory...

IDK, my BFF Lord.

Ascribe to the Lord the glory due His name;
Bring an offering, and come before Him;
Worship the Lord in holy array.
-1 Chronicles 16:29

Have you ever sat and wondered at the amazement that God thought you worthy to die for? I don’t think I do often enough. This amazing sacrifice allows us to have such an intimate relationship that we can talk to Him, walk with Him, and spend every minute in His presence. He is my best friend and I love the fact that we can have that kind of relationship with Him. But then it hits me: My best friend is the Creator and Lord of the entire universe! I speak with Him, sing with Him, read with the King of Kings on a daily basis! Talk about wondrous love! This verse reminds me, however, that He is just that: Lord of Lords. Flipping through my prayer journal, I realized just how often I write “Lord” as a comfortable name for my savior. And while I am so grateful for the intimate relationship He made the way for, I don’t want “Lord” to become just another name. I want to remember that He is Lord and give Him the worship and honor and glory worth to Him just for being who He is. Before I even consider the fact that He is my savior and creator of everything, He is God and deserves more praise than I could ever possibly give Him. I don’t want to ever forget to “ascribe to the Lord the glory due His name” alone.

This Far

Who am I, O Lord God, and what is my house that You have brought me this far?
-1 Chronicles 17:16b

Tonight as I was reading, I came across this passage in 1 Chronicles. David is King over Israel and has just brought the Ark of the Covenant to Jerusalem. He erects a tent to house the ark and realizes that while he resides in a grand house built of wood, the house of the Lord is merely a tent, a collection of curtains. David declares that he will build a temple for the Lord. That night, however, the prophet Nathan hears a message from God that he is to deliver to King David: God does not want David to build the temple, but rather intends for David’s son, the next king, to do so. The following morning, Nathan delivers the news and the first thing David responds with is verse 16.
Although this story is also found a few chapters earlier in 2 Samuel 7 and I had read it a few months ago, it struck me in a very different way. Being the nostalgic that I am, I was thinking back on where I was a year ago. Getting ready to move away from home and go to college, I was excited to begin the next chapter of my life and start what I assumed was God’s perfect plan for my life. The summer before my junior year of high school I had felt called to ministry as a worship leader, so I declared myself a music major and was preparing myself for college life. I could not have even begun to image all the amazing things I was going to encounter over the next year, however.
If I could sum up my walk with God over the last year, it would simply be that He has showed me over and over again that His plan is infinitely better than my own. Like David, I was so excited to do the work I thought God intended for me. And like David, I was surprised to find that He had something different in mind. Although my plan was filled with the best intentions of serving Him, it had never even crossed my mind that God might have something entirely different. Although I still feel that full-time ministry is something God is calling me into after college, I really can’t say where he is going to lead me. I am only beginning to see Him shaping me and my life into what He intends me to be. I only hope I can be humbled like David when He does show me His plans and responds to them with the praise and worship he deserves. Like David, I sometimes can’t even believe that He would chose me to be his servant.

“This was a small thing in Your eyes, O God; but You have spoken of Your servant’s house for a great while to come, and have regarded me according to the standard of man of high degree, O Lord God.
What more can David still say to you concerning the honor bestowed on Your servant? For You know your servant”
-verse 17-18

I Once Was Blind

John 9 tells the story of Jesus returning the sight of a man who had been blind from birth. After briefly speaking with the man, Jesus covers his eyes with mud and instructs him to go wash it off in a nearby river. The man follows His instruction and soon realizes the wonder of what has happened to him. News travels fast in the village he calls home and it isn’t long before the Pharisees hear of the miracle and they are certain that Jesus is responsible for the miracle. They immediately, however become concerned with the fact that this healing has occurred on the Sabbath, when no work should be done. Thinking they can defame Jesus because He has broken the Law of Moses, they immediately find the man and bring him into the temple, pressing him with questions about his healer. Nonetheless, the man admits that he doesn’t know the identity of the man who healed them. Frustrated, the Pharisees discuss this, searching for answers from the man, sending him out of their presence, and even questioning his parents before calling him back into the temple a second time.

So a second time they called the man who had been blind, and said to him, “Give glory to God; we know that this man is a sinner.”
He then answered, “Whether He is a sinner, I do not know; one thing I do know, that though I was blind, how I see.”
-John 9:24-25

Wow! What an amazing picture of faith! This man knew nothing about Jesus before his remarkable encounter with Him. The saving power and grace was all he needed to know. He had been healed and Jesus was the one who had healed him. That Jesus was capable of bringing him the healing he so desperately desired was all he needed to know.

The man answered and said to them, “Well here is an amazing thing, that you do not know where He is from, and yet He opened my eyes.
We know that God does not hear sinners; but if anyone is God-fearing and does his will, He hears him.
Since the beginning of time it has never been heard that anyone opened the eyes of a person born blind.
If this man were not from God, He could do nothing.”
-verses 30-33

For this man, it seems simple enough logic that Jesus must be the Son of God because of the miraculous work He has performed in him that day. But the Pharisees are so caught up in the little rules they are letting it get in the way of the amazing picture standing right before them. God is in their presence, and performing miracles no less! Despite their direct encounters with the Almighty Lord of Lords, they are not capable of seeing over their law books.
God, don’t let me get so caught up in the little details that don’t really matter and miss seeing the amazing work you are performing right before my eyes!

The Charm Bracelet

Taken from the April 2008 Brio and Beyond Magazine:

The Charm Bracelet

By: Sarah Kistler

Sweet 16 had finally come! I never thought I'd make it. But I did. And it was amazing. My parents threw the birthday part of the century, and I had more people than I could count. The whole day had been awesome. But as I watched the sun begin to set, I knew the best part was soon to come.

It was late in the evening. Confetti had been swept up, helium balloons had started to sag and gift wrap had been folded neatly and tucked away for my mom's later use. As I sad at my window studying the dusky sky, Dad peeked into the room with a smile.

"Ready to go, Sweetie?" he asked.

Was that a trick question? I wondered as I scrambled to my feet. I'd been waiting for this night for five long years, and it was finally here! I was now officially allowed to date!

The plan was for my parents and me to go to my favorite restaurant on the night of my 16th birthday and officiate the agreement, go over standards and discuss rules and such. And now we were finally on our way.

I sat across from my parents in a quiet corner booth. Having just placed our orders, I figured it was time to get on with it. "So. I can go out with any guy I want to, right?" I squealed, hardly able to contain my excitement.

Mom and Dad chucked. Dad answered, "Well, we agreed to that, didn't we?"

"Sweet!" I exclaimed, doing a little victory dance in my seat. My parents had held me off for years, but now that the time had come, they would let me date any guy I wanted! Of course they knew I had a good relationship with God and wasn't too short on common sense, either.

"Now wait just a second," Mom interrupted with a smile. "You have to agree to a little something yourself."

I was expecting a lecture of some sort, so I was already prepared. "So what do I have to do now?" I asked, leaning forward on my elbows.

"Just open this," Dad answered, producing a small white box. He gave a mysterious smile.

I hesitated a moment before removing the curly pink ribbon. I slowly opened the lid and saw a beautiful silver bracelet. But not just any bracelet. It was a charm bracelet. And they weren't just any charms. They were gemstones, small but gorgeous. A dozen dainty charms dangled gently.

"Wow." I didn't know what else to say. I wasn't expecting this at all.

"Now you have to understand this isn't just any bracelet," Mom informed me.

"I know," I said. "It's so beautiful!" I studied it closer. There were six small charms alternating with tinier ones. The smaller ones were deep blue. Sapphires, I guessed. And the other six were each different. One appeared to be just a rock, one was pink, a white one, a red one, green... and was that a diamond?

"This charm bracelet is symbolic," Dad explained, leaning in closer to study it with me. "It represents you and your purity. This is what will guide you through your dating relationships. Your mother and I can only tell you what's right. We can't make you believe it yourself. Hopefully, this will."

I looked up solemnly. "I'm listening."

"This represents the first time you hold a guy's hand," Mom said, pointing to the gray one. "It's just a piece of polished granite. Seemingly cheap, yes, but it's still a part of your bracelet. This is pink quartz." She gently rubbed the next one between her fingers. "It represents your first kiss."

"This green one is an emerald," Dad continued. "This is your first boyfriend. The pearl is the first time you say 'I love you' to a man other than me."

I giggled. This was so amazing.

"The ruby stands for your first engagement. And the diamond represents the first time you say 'I do,'" Mom finished.

After letting it all sink in, I cleared my emotion-clogged throat. "What do the six tiny sapphires stand for?" I asked.

"Those are to remind you how beautiful and valuable you are to us and to God," Dad replied. "Now here's the hitch in all this, the only and only rule you'll ever have to follow when it comes to dating."

Only one rule. Sounded good. But little did I know...

"Whenever you give one of these actions of love- a kiss, an 'I love you', a hand to hold- you also have to give the recipient the gem to match."

I must've misunderstood. "I have to give him the gem?"

"You have to give it to him," Mom restated.

I was silent for a moment. I thought they must be joking. But they weren't even thinking of cracking a smile.

"But Daddy!" I suddenly shrieked. "These are insanely expensive! I can't just give them away!"

He gave a soft, loving chuckle, "Did you hear what you just said?"

I thought about it.

"Baby, your purity, your heart, they're far more valuable than a few little rocks. If you can't find it in your heart to give away your little charms, I don't think you should be giving away the things they represent."

I could feel my insides melting, ready to gush out of my tear ducts. One the one hands, it made me feel valuable and precious. But on the other, it made me furious. It made no sense. But it would.

A few weeks after that night, I was hanging out with my friends at the beach. Chad wouldn't swim because I wouldn't swim. I was more interested in reading than getting caked with sand, and he was more interested in sitting with me than swimming with his buddies. He was sweet. He was cute. And he tried to hold my hand.

I was thrilled for a nanosecond when a certain piece of ugly granite flashed through my mind and made me move out of his reach. I was severely annoyed- annoyed at my parents, annoyed at my bracelet-turned-handcuffs, but most of all, annoyed at myself. I was letting a little rock dominate my romantic life.

I furiously glared at it during the whole embarrassing walk to the bathhouse. But then God hit me upside the head with shocking epiphany. I couldn't give up my little chunk of granite. It was part of my bracelet, which in a sense made it a part of me. I wouldn't be whole without it. It wasn't a priceless gem, yet it was still valuable. It made sense after that.

Kevin came along eventually. We had fun. we hung out a lot. I thought I might love him. I thought I might tell him so. I thought of my pearl. It turned out that I didn't love him as much as I thought I did.

So my parents had been right. They couldn't make me believe the thins they wanted me to believe. So they let God and my bracelet do the work instead. Among the four of them, I figured out how valuable I was. How valuable my purity was. How not valuable guys were who just wanted my time and emotions. If they weren't in it for the whole bracelet, why should they get one part of it?

Nate. He thought my bracelet was awesome. So he never tried to hold my hand. He never tried to kiss me. But he asked me to marry him.

I never knew that so many years of torture could amount to so much happiness. I'd thought it was silly. I'd thought it was overrated. But now, I've never been more glad of anything in my life. As I gave my husband the charm bracelet in its entirety, I wondered why I had found it so hard to hang on to those little rocks when it was amazing to give them all to the man I truly loved.

But it didn't end there. Now our daughter wears it.

February 9, 2009

Then the Lord spoke to Moses...

-Exodus 19:21a (NASB)

At the beginning of this year, I embarked on a mission to read through the Bible in a year. The last month since starting I've been absolutely blessed by how much I've learned and grown through this study (which is a wonderful devotion that I would definitely recommend to anyone). The last few days, however, I found myself drudging through Exodus chapters 25-30 in my Old Testament portion of the daily assignment. These are some of the chapters where God gives Moses instructions on how to perform sacrifices, how the temple should be constructed, the exact measurements of the alters, curtains, etc. Needless to say, its not exactly the most exhilarating read.

Today as I was reading, however, I realized how often a passage begins "then the Lord spoke to Moses" or "then God said to him", etc. I've read those words thousands of times and they're not exactly anything particularly special, but today I couldn't help but be captivated by them. How cool would it have been to be Moses, and actually have face to face conversations with God? The Old Testament talks about how the glory of God was so amazing that the Israelites had to keep their distance, but moses was invited to come and speak with God directly.

Wow. Simply, wow.

But as amazing as that is, I am even more amazed by the incredible grace of God. Jesus' death on the cross allows us to have that personal relationship with our Lord and give us the opportunity for conversations with God. I am so grateful for all the word God is doing in my life, especially in these last few weeks and the way he has already been speaking to my through my devotion. Today was just another reminder of His faithfulness and how gracious He is, through the simplest of verses in the simplest of ways.

February 4, 2009

As they were leaving Jericho, a large crowd followed Him.

And two blind men sitting by the road, hearing that Jesus was passing by cried out, "Lord have mercy on us, Son of David!"

The crowd sternly told them to be quiet, but they cried out all the more, "Lord, Son of David, have mercy on us!"

And Jesus stopped and called them, and said, "What do you want Me to do for ou?"

They said to Him, "Lord we want our eyes to be opened."

Moved with compassion, Jesus touched their eyes; and immediately they regained their sight and followed Him.

-Matthew 20:29-34

You know, I'm one of those people who has been raised and church and heard all the Bible stories since I was a little kiddo in the nursery. So I'm more than sure that I've probably heard this particular story hundreds of times before. But tonight it struck me in a far different way than ever before. The two blind men heard Jesus was coming and instantly longed for Him to come and change their lives. They couldn't see Him but had faith that the could heal them and restore their lives. They couldn't see Him but had faith that he could heal them and restore their lives. And their faith was rewarded. Jesus felt such a compassion for them and their desire to know and see Him that he restored their sing. And that's the end of the story... right? The thing that struck me the most was those last three words: and followed Him. They left everything behind to follow the man who had so dramatically altered their sight and given them back their lives. I wish I had their faith. But God has essentially done the same for me. "I once was lost but now am found, was blind but now I see" is arguably the most famous hymn ever written, but somehow those words get lost between my head and my heart. Despite all that God has done for me, I am so reluctant to give Him my everything and devote my entire being to Him.

So while God is working all this in my heart, I continue reading and, lo and behold, just a page or two later:

[Jesus said to them], "A man had two songs, and he came to the first and said, 'Son, go work today in the vineyard.' 

And he answered, 'I will not'; but afterward he regretted it and went.

Then man came to the second and said the same thing; and he answered, 'I will, sir'; but he did not go.

Which of the two did the will of his father?" [The priests and elders] said, "The first." Jesus said to them, "truly I say to you that the tax collectors and prostitutes will get into the Kingdom of God before you."

-Matthew 21:28-31

Being a follower of Christ means so much more than the words you say or how often you go to church. Being a follower of Christ means making Him the absolute center of your being and striving to make every aspect of your life worship to Him. After all, he cured me from "blindness" and never ceases to love me. He deserves my everything! I know He has called me into a life of full-time ministry and I am so excited to see where He leads me. But I can't continue to just talk about what I'm going to do for Him. Even though I feel my ministry is going to be my career, I don't have to and shouldn't wait until I have a degree to begin. I don't want to be that second son.

January 26, 2009

My God, my God, why have You forsaken men?

Far from my deliverance are the words of my groaning.

Oh my God, I cry by day, but you do not answer;

And by night, but I have no rest.

Yet You are holy,

O You who are enthroned upon the praises of Israel.

-Psalm 22:1-3

You know, God never ceases to amaze me, and I find that the more I delve into His word, the more I fall in love with Him and discover the incredible promises He has for me.

But this passage left me with a different feeling. Rather than rejoicing in the outpouring of love God shows me, this song of David forced me to step back and evaluate the outpouring of love I show God. The past few weeks have been incredible as my faith and relationship with Christ has reached a very different place, but this passage reminded me that God deserves my praise and adoration even in the darkest times, when I cannot see Him. How beautiful are David's words: Yet You are holy!! Talk about faith!

The chapter goes on to talk about how even when David is in the worst moments of his life, "You, O Lord, be not far off; O You my help, hasten to my assistance. Deliver my soul from the sword, My only life from the power of the dog. Save me from the lion's mouth; From the horns of the wild oxen answer me" (vv. 19-21). There is that wonderful promise from God that I've come to love so much. But it comes sixteen verses after David's praise of the Lord! What a wonderful reminder that God deserves our praise even when we do not understand the situation we find ourselves in. We cannot always see God's plan, and it may not be come in our own timing, but He is always right beside us, ready to pull us out of the lion's mouth or save us from the wild oxen of this world.

"We are not alone. He makes himself known in time, His own time"

-Brandon Heath, Beauty Divine